Rickresource Rickenbacker Forum

That, and haggis, created to befoul and bestench the enemy's turf, both upon entering and exiting...

...not to mention it's one more use for sheep's stomachs.

(Is there another?)

Don't forget the "neeps and tatties" as well. Of course let's not miss out on the "bubble and squeak" later in the week.

Let's see...you could make bagpipes out of one...yikes...

Hmmm...bagpipes and 'aggis.

Bloody 'ell, where's this thread off to now???

BTW, after piping it in there's an official address to the haggis.

It goes something like this:

Fair fa' your honest, sonsie face,
Great chieftain o' the pudding-race!
Aboon them a' yet tak your place,
Painch, tripe, or thairm:
Weel are ye wordy o'a grace
As lang's my arm.

The groaning trencher there ye fill,
Your hurdies like a distant hill,
Your pin was help to mend a mill
In time o'need,
While thro' your pores the dews distil
Like amber bead.

His knife see rustic Labour dight,
An' cut you up wi' ready sleight,
Trenching your gushing entrails bright,
Like ony ditch;
And then, O what a glorious sight,
Warm-reekin', rich!

Then, horn for horn, they stretch an' strive:
Deil tak the hindmost! on they drive,
Till a' their weel-swall'd kytes belyve
Are bent like drums;
Then auld Guidman, maist like to rive,
Bethankit! hums.

Is there that owre his French ragout
Or olio that wad staw a sow,
Or fricassee wad make her spew
Wi' perfect sconner,
Looks down wi' sneering, scornfu' view
On sic a dinner?

Poor devil! see him owre his trash,
As feckles as wither'd rash,
His spindle shank, a guid whip-lash;
His nieve a nit;
Thro' blody flood or field to dash,
O how unfit!

But mark the Rustic, haggis-fed,
The trembling earth resounds his tread.
Clap in his walie nieve a blade,
He'll mak it whissle;
An' legs an' arms, an' hands will sned,
Like taps o' trissle.

Ye Pow'rs, wha mak mankind your care,
And dish them out their bill o' fare,
Auld Scotland wants nae skinking ware
That jaups in luggies;
But, if ye wish her gratefu' prayer
Gie her a haggis!

This happens most frequently on Robbie Burns night.

...no doubt right after Robbie burns...

I may have got the odd word or two wrong but hopefully they (Scots) wont hang me from the gallows for any slight imperfections.

It's beheading with a broadsword up there, innit?

I always figured that's how golf got invented...

If it goes right, it's a slice. If it goes left, it's a hook. If it goes straight, it's a miracle.

Author Unknown

Now we are way off subject!!

Are we? Oh, you're right...we are...

"Welcome to the Forum once again, Charlie Kittleson!"

(Guess we'll have to start a new thread: "Broadswords and Bagpipes - A Comparitive Study of Iconoclastic Elements Within the Works of 'Jethro Tull' and 'Wings'"...)

I'd say, "Mel Gibson, too", but this is a Rick Forum.

I'd add Rick Wakeman, but this is a Rick Forum.

Yeah, you need to post it on the Wakeman Forum.

Where it will get lost in a buncha posts about SONY alarm clocks...

Speaking of which...does anyone know how to make the VCR stop flashing twelve o'clock?

Kindly awaiting any information you can provide...

Yes Dane, I am here to help. Cut off a small piece of black electrical tape about 2 inches long and stick it over the flashing time.