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Take a Deep Breath

Posted: Sat Sep 06, 2008 4:55 pm
by winston
This may seem like common sense and it also may seem a bit out of sync with all the great changes that are being made to this forum.............but please consider the following before you post.

When you dash off a post that is thoughtless and perhaps harsh or cutting you may be compounding someones troubles in a way that you will never fully understand. Many will take the abuse and die another inch inside without ever showing that you hurt them more than they can express. Some will retaliate and they will bear the brunt of the penalty exacted for over stepping the mark. Either way you are making them a victim and a target.

Please remember to be kind to those who cross your path on your journey through life. An act of kindness won't necessarily be remembered by the giver but the recipient will remember it until the day they die.

In closing please take a deep breath and think before you post something that might possibly hurt or affect someone in a negative way.

Re: Take a Deep Breath

Posted: Sat Sep 06, 2008 5:01 pm
by doctorwho
Excellent advice, Brian.

Even I have been guilty of not thinking through a response of my own (I don't recall what one) ... it almost caused a problem with a fellow Forumite, but we got it straightened out with no hurt on either side.

Re: Take a Deep Breath

Posted: Sat Sep 06, 2008 5:02 pm
by rickenbrother
Excellent, Brian, I have re-posted this as a quote in the bass forum.

Re: Take a Deep Breath

Posted: Sat Sep 06, 2008 5:42 pm
by admin
Brian: Your point is an excellent one and reflects my thoughts entirely.

The only additional comment I would offer is that this insightful and tempered approach should apply equally when RRF posters are referring to those who are members here and to those who are not. The Internet is a small place.

Re: Take a Deep Breath

Posted: Sat Sep 06, 2008 5:46 pm
by ozover50
Well said, Brian..... couldn't agree more.

Re: Take a Deep Breath

Posted: Sat Sep 06, 2008 6:04 pm
by indianation65
Mr. Brother,
An apropos forum name, "Rickenbrother"...
Mr. Winston,
Good sentiments and applause to you and the "intended"! I believe the real problem is not regarding opposing views, but in a lack of "tact" while espousing them. To be a harsh, persnickety contrarian is tolerable when "music" points are the target of the inquiry, not a forum brother. To be a diplomat is not really that hard to do. We all stand on opposite sides of the same room, but one man should still be able to walk to the line in the middle and offer someone else a firm handshake!

...wisdom

Re: Take a Deep Breath

Posted: Sat Sep 06, 2008 6:16 pm
by Rickygirl
Very eloquently put Brian.

I wholeheartedly agree.

Re: Take a Deep Breath

Posted: Sat Sep 06, 2008 6:25 pm
by kiramdear
My mom always said if you don't have something nice to say, don't say anything.

Acually, all we need to remember is what we learned in Kinderarten:
1. Don't hit
2. Share, and be helpful
3. Play nicely with the others
4. Take turns
5. Don't lie
6. Eat lunch
7. Take a nap together in the afternoons
8. Join hands in a circle at least once a day
9. Raise one finger for... ah, never mind.

I used to have all this stuff down; all too often I forget my manners and then Mom (God rest her soul) pops in to remind me how it was before all this life happened.

Re: Take a Deep Breath

Posted: Sat Sep 06, 2008 11:36 pm
by freshmattyp
That knife cuts both ways. In my opinon, there is a groupthink here that I do not see on other brand specific boards. People who do not follow the forum mind set are not well tolerated. I expect some boosterism, but here it seems out of control.

YMMV

Re: Take a Deep Breath

Posted: Sun Sep 07, 2008 1:30 am
by stubby
Good point Matt. Tolerance is paramount, not just here but in life generally. We always have to rememer that tolerance has to be an openess to divergent opinions and perspectives, especially if it's an opinion that, at first read/consideration, get our hackles up. In an electronic forum we can't assume that familiarity and our self-perceived sense of solid "character" or good intentions gives us a moral high ground of any kind.

Re: Take a Deep Breath

Posted: Sun Sep 07, 2008 3:03 am
by ozover50
Matt: Brian's post speaks of tolerance, understanding and forethought and others have expressed the same feeling or supported the sentiment........ your post appears to be the antithesis of that and leans toward intolerance.

Whilst I appreciate and perhaps understand your post, Peter has stated on many, many occasions why this forum was created and its intent - a celebration of all things Rickenbacker. With that in mind, negative comments tend to raise the hackles of those who embrace that credo to a high level and they become very defensive of the instruments, the company and its personnel. Many of those people don't subsequently comment but some do..... which is their right - as it is yours.

I'm sure that many, including me, don't see such defence as 'out of control boosterism'. I liken it more to an avid Cheesehead or Manchester United supporter rooting for his/her team. :mrgreen:

Comments relating to those who comment are simply inflammatory in my opinion and Peter has had his say on that in this very thread.

Re: Take a Deep Breath

Posted: Sun Sep 07, 2008 3:11 am
by rickenbrother
ozover50 wrote:Matt: Brian's post speaks of tolerance, understanding and forethought and others have expressed the same feeling or supported the sentiment........ your post appears to be the antithesis of that and leans toward intolerance.

Whilst I appreciate and perhaps understand your post, Peter has stated on many, many occasions why this forum was created and its intent - a celebration of all things Rickenbacker. With that in mind, negative comments tend to raise the hackles of those who embrace that credo to a high level and they become very defensive of the instruments, the company and its personnel. Many of those people don't subsequently comment but some do..... which is their right - as it is yours.

I'm sure that many, including me, don't see such defence as 'out of control boosterism'. I liken it more to an avid Cheesehead or Manchester United supporter rooting for his/her team. :mrgreen:
+1

Re: Take a Deep Breath

Posted: Sun Sep 07, 2008 6:37 am
by admin
Matt: I agree that there is a "groupthink" here at RickResource Forum and I appeciate your bringing it into focus. Simply put, it is a caring and respect for others.

At the core of assertiveness is the ability to express one's point of view without disregarding or hurting others. This is a learned process that comes from listening and caring about others. It is a key to acceptance and success in relating to others regardless of the venue in which we find ourselves.

While expressing our point of view here we choose to be sensitive to the feelings of others and first and foremost that includes the people at RIC whose product was the reason for creating this Forum in the first place. This journey with Rickenbacker has been more than a decade now in the making. It is something that we do not take for granted.

Freedom of expression is important, but I have learned that people want to know how much you care before they care how much you know.

Re: Take a Deep Breath

Posted: Sun Sep 07, 2008 7:42 am
by longboard_ric
Very well put Brian.

Patience, tolerance, understanding and even common courtesy seem to be vanishing at a rapid pace in todays world.

Re: Take a Deep Breath

Posted: Sun Sep 07, 2008 10:30 am
by stubby
I wanted to clear up my posting from last night. In my post, I think I got a little overly exuberant in underlining words to emphasize the point I was making. I agree with the sentiments in this thread and I was chiming in to say that I agree with Brian that kindess is needed in a forum like this. My post was continuing this sentiment by trying to say that not only should we be kind and think before we post but we should also be tolerant of other people's views and opinions when they express them, whether we agree with them or not. I don't think my wording was very effective and after re-reading it, it looks like my posting might be "aimed" at specific individuals (i.e. implying that they are not tolerant). This was absolutely not my intention and I hope nobody took offense. Actually, it's kind of ironic that my small rant for tolerance might come off as an intolerant posting! In any event, no offense was meant.