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4003 MG Defender
Posted: Sun Jan 23, 2005 4:41 am
by grayk
I was playing in a club last night and all of a sudden this nightmare guy walks up to the front of the stage. Real serious nutter! about 20 stone (280lbs) 44 kilos. Hes got what we call in the UK an anorak (you're smirking) on. You might call it a windcheater? in the US. Hes got the hood up and the cord tied tight round his fat face. His face is really red, sweaty and messsed up, quite a frightening sight. So he comes and stands with his toes touching the front of the 18" stage and just stares at us. He then makes a move and climbs up on stage coming at me. The thought of Keith Richards comes into mind, this guy is a threat!!
But in that split second I thought "what if I wreck or damage my lovely MG" So quick as a flash the bass was spun around and I put arms out and held the guy at that distance. I managed to persuade him down but who knows what all the wet stuff on my hands was!!! UUUURGH! But it could have been so much worse. Why do these clubs let these nut jobs in ? So the MG is still all intact and I didnt get put on an assault charge. Jim had it been my Fireglo it might have been another story !! Ha Ha
Posted: Sun Jan 23, 2005 6:36 am
by rickcrazy
Hey Keith,
I believe you meant to say approx. 130 kilograms, not 44.
Yes, I remember seeing (on TV) Keith Richards hitting with his Telecaster some guy who had climbed up on stage. Well, if a Fender, with its bolt-on neck, can take such extreme treatment, so can a Rick, believe me. But maybe the best guitar for the job is a '70s Kramer bass with the aluminum neck and the mean-looking, fork-like headstock - lethal!
Posted: Sun Jan 23, 2005 8:16 am
by grayk
Thanks for that correction Sergio, I never did quite grasp the metric way of things ! Yes the Kramer would have been preferable. But come to think of it, I used to have a Steinberger headless thing, and I thought it was useless.....maybe not?
Just in case you didnt receive my return email Sergio, I did receive yours ok. Thanks
Posted: Sun Jan 23, 2005 8:42 am
by henny
Man, if that happened to me I'd have NO reservations about 'stabbing' the guy (for want of a better phrase) with the headstock in the stomach.
Not to penetrate, nor cause serious injury/pain, just to divert their attentions to their weakspots so you can gain the upper hand and throw them off.
Where was the club Keith, and where in Britain you from?
Posted: Sun Jan 23, 2005 9:21 am
by atomic_punk
Keith, if you had a BC Rich you could have been brought up on manslughter charges!
I almost had to bean a guy who was after our female lead singer / guitarist once, kept coming up, kept coming up, then climbed on stage, I called for security and then took off the Hamer 12 and was about ready to wind up when the guys in the windbreakers grabbed him.
Now I almost always wear boots (ala Martens) on stage so I can kick em in the teeth if I have to. Thankfully, I havent had to do that

Posted: Sun Jan 23, 2005 9:35 am
by grayk
It is a problem Henny, I dare say many people who play in the clubs and pubs/bars have come across dodgy characters. I also think you are well within your rights to defend yourself against these oddballs. I am pleased that it never amounted to anything more than it did. Had I had reacted more aggressively, how would it have looked? At the very least it would have meant that we wouldnt have been re-booked at a really good little venue. At worst a GBH charge I suppose. I played over 200 gigs with a very well supported punk covers band a few years ago. Never once did I come across anyone who was aggressive towards the band. There was some choice charcters used to follow that band thats for sure ! The pub/club was in Scarborough, and I am from (the glorious!!) Kingston upon Hull in the East Riding of Yorkshire.
Posted: Sun Jan 23, 2005 9:39 am
by grayk
I'll have to dig the old black 8 holer Docs out then Steve !! Do you think they will look well with a 60's suit ? I bet there is a lot of these kind of stories to be told.
Posted: Sun Jan 23, 2005 9:42 am
by grayk
Correction: I bet there ARE a lot of these kind of stories to be told.
Posted: Sun Jan 23, 2005 9:49 am
by dminer
Keith, you did the right thing and re-acted properly...if he was really out to get you he would have attacked...probably he was just blotto and any aggression on your part might have escalated the whole affair into a melee...I've seen the same situation plenty and they almost always are just drunk and out of it...unfortunately security is often lacking and the house should have taken care of the situation before the guy ever set foot on stage. I once had a disgruntled drunkard red-neck leave after I had said something to him and then try and walk back in the club with a 45...good thing the cops were at the door!!
Posted: Sun Jan 23, 2005 9:57 am
by grayk
Thank God it was Scarborough, England where it happened ! There wasn't any security of any kind David. It isnt the type of place where you would generally get trouble. I believe it was a one off.
Posted: Sun Jan 23, 2005 12:04 pm
by jwr2
maybe if you play a bar like that you should get a beater ric ... one that you can use as a weapon ...
Posted: Sun Jan 23, 2005 12:08 pm
by rickenbrother
Your guitar strap is a very good weapon for self defense, especially with straplocks installed.
Posted: Sun Jan 23, 2005 12:18 pm
by grayk
Good idea Jeff...you have got me thinking. I like to keep my guitars fairly pristine. All it takes is for a jerk like that to do something crazy and the guitar gets it. To be fair these occurrences are few and far between. I wouldnt mind a beater for these venues that have stages were you are all on top of each other clanking headstocks/cymbals etc.
Posted: Sun Jan 23, 2005 12:45 pm
by rickcrazy
A fake 4001 would be perfect for the job.
Posted: Sun Jan 23, 2005 4:02 pm
by jwr2
get a 2030 ... that massive body can be used to protect yourself ...